Saturday, October 10, 2009

Storytime With Meadow: Adult Twilight Fanfiction Story

Hello faithful readers! As you know I spend much of my time on twitter ignoring my kids searching for new fanfics, so when I saw a tweet about a MALE fanfiction author I couldn't resist. One Twilight Widower was so upset that he decided to fight to win his wife back from Edward. He goes by the author name "wantmywifeback" and his profile is a cry for understanding, compassion, and companionship. You can view his profile here:

Here is his reason behind writing a fanfic:

"I am a Twilight widower. My wife discovered these books and I haven't seen her since. There's no food in the house. I've eaten the last of the toothpaste. The clothes haven't been washed and have actually developed language skills and taken over the linen closet to begin some anarcho-syndicist commune. My socks barked at me. I'm wearing the paper yard-waste bags now.

I am afraid.

I want my wife back so I'm writing fan fiction with sexual content in the hopes that she'll find her way back home again. And because I'm horny... and dirty... and I smell bad. Pam cooking spray does not make a good deodorant, but my underarm hair has a nice glossy coat, like a primped show dog. Oh... and about the dog.

...he's my only friend...

Please come back to me, baby. I miss you. I need you. I know now I cannot live without you. My own mother won't let me get within 30-feet of her, even down wind."

So please, support him in his quest. Read his insightful (and hot!) fiction, titled "Adult Twilight Fanfiction Story." Kudos to you Mr. Wantmywifeback. I hope Mrs. Wantmywifeback finds your story and finds her way back to your bed. And kitchen. And laundry room. P.S. You might want to invest in a maid. And premade meals. Just a thought to get you through these dark times.



Jessica said...

If you can't beat 'em, join 'em!

I've read a one shot from the husband of a very well known author in the fandom and I've come across Leon and saved one of his fics, it's inching it's way to the top!

Deconstructing Jen said...

Bwaha! If his fic is as good as his profile then he's sure to be a hit. This is hilarious and awesome!

kt said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH I LOVE IT!!! i read his profile and his fics (both of them!) to my male roommate and he was laughing almost as hard as me. i had tears in my eyes. loves it!

Snarkier Than You said...

this is too funny!!! love it - maybe he should join the junior league & you guys could fix him up & help him win the wifey back over??? superpower: able to repel mortal women with his unshowered BO? no? hmmm...

: )