Friday, July 31, 2009


Summit has released the official picture of the Volturi. But we at The League thought we'd do a little celebrity look-alike version...

Mr. Bean, what? How did you get the role of Aro? I never noticed your widows peak before now! I'm going to take a closer look at you, you seem to have big balls pull with Suckmit to land this gig.

I'm still confused... I thought Caius was a guy?

I'm not so sure about that, Rain.

Rosalie is going to be pissed when she sees Caius and realizes that there's a much more beautiful woman in the Vamp world than she.


Thursday, July 30, 2009

Victoria's Reincarnation

The role of Victoria will now be played by Bryce Dallas Howard due to what Summit refers to as a "scheduling conflict" that Rachelle Lefevre has with another movie which begins production the same day as Eclipse. The League cries foul, especially after Rachelle Lefevre issued her own statement detailing how she was thrown to the wolves, which we trust over anything Summit had to say in their statement.

I call FOUL! Something is fishy about this. Scheduling conflict?? She had a contract in place and a 10 day job overlapping a 3 month shoot?! And isn't her role quite LARGE in Eclipse for a kinda LARGE franchise for them to just replace her??? Hmmmm... *tapping long red nails on desk in deep thought*

I think "scheduling conflict" is French for "pissed management off". Maybe she pulled a Suzanne Somers and demanded a raise for her bigger role?

I call FAIL! Epic FAIL, Summit. Seriously?! Rachelle Lefevre was one of the best cast stars of the Twilight movies. She was the perfect Victoria. While I'm sure Bryce Dallas Howard is a talented actress, I don't think this is a good move AT ALL.

But at this stage should we even be surprised by this latest bonehead move by Summit? Nope! Summit only told half the truth. That part being the recasting of Victoria. The rest of their statement is total BS.

I love Bryce Dallas Howard though. *ducking*

No really, I wish they hadn't replaced Rachelle because I don't like casting changes in a movie series. And she seems so down to earth and cool to her fans on Twitter. However, if they ARE replacing her, I think they picked the right actress to do it.

I don't care if Opie's daughter is a master thespian in the making. Rachelle Lefevre IS Victoria just as much as Taylor Lautner IS Jacob Black. What's next, Summit? Recasting Rosalie? Hmm.... *sinister grin*

Maybe Slade didn't like her acting. I mean it's hard to tell the range of her acting ability from, "I'm the one with the wicked curve ball."

Well what about the prom scene? The way she tore her hair down and stormed off. I loved it!

I think I wouldn't be taking this news so hard if Rachelle weren't such a great person. She obviously loved playing Victoria and I'm really sad for her.

And, furthermore, if they needed to replace Rachelle Lefevre with another redhead they only had to come to The League. Ginger wouldn't mind getting her head ripped off by Edward Cullen, right Ging?

Yes! They should've picked me. Mmmm... I don't mind Edward giving me ripping off my head.

You know what Spank thinks? Spank thinks Summit can suck it.

Summit + Suck It = Suckmit.


Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Jr. League: Plan "B"

This weeks Jr. League member is: T-Rose

Superpowers: Mind control, super-human speed and flight

I want to know which of the Cullen guys you each love and why? And, importantly, do you love the character (e.g. Edward), the real person (e.g. Rob Pattinson), or both? I'm very curious as to what it is about these guys that makes you all tick. Me, personally, I am both an Edward and Robert fan. They are both my fav all the way. And, unlike some Twifans, I can discern the difference between the two.

GREAT TOPIC! Let's make it really fun and take Edward out of the equation - JUST FOR A MINUTE - and talk about which other characters we love and why.

This will come as a big shock to you but if I can't have Edward I have to go with Jasper. There is something about his inner conflict about both being able to control the emotions of people around him and yet not having complete control over his own urges that intriques me. Also he's the one vampire of the Cullen Clan who fully lived the nomadic life of a vampire and was a complete bad-ass before joining the Cullen Clan. And I cannot leave out his swoonworthy love and devotion to his beloved Alice (the coolest chick in the story). Oh, and, of course, I love how yummy Jackson Rathbone looks in a baseball shirt.

Taking Edward out of the equation is like trying to enjoy eggs benedict without the eggs.

Mr. Molina the biology teacher!!! He was so believable as the dorky teacher! "Goldennnn Onion"! Brilliant. His line delivery was spot on for all three that he had.

This one is EASY for me. Emmett. Definitely Emmett. I loved him in the books, even though he is the one we know the least about (as far as the Cullens go). I love his sense of humor and how he lives to have fun. In the movie, I absolutely love him! I love the knife-wave when Bella visits the Cullens, I love his laugh with Edward during the baseball scene, I love how he handles Rosalie. Wait, did I mention that I love him? I'm not sure I made that clear.

So, let me get this straight Rain, you like a knife yielding man? Yeah, that's cool! And he's a bully... You need therapy. Seriously!

He is NOT a bully! He has to deal with Rosalie all the time so he has to be a little feisty. And, Spider... Seriously? You're questioning my taste? Mr. Molina? Yeah... okay.

Oh come on guys, you know what my answer is going to be. BUTTCRACK SANTA!!!! I wanna see how he handles his little bottles.


Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Nature's EHarmony

I've been thinking (uh oh). Maybe imprinting is not such a bad idea. I mean think about it. It takes all the guesswork out of who you spend your life with. It's not based on looks or talent, money or personal preferences. It just is and the gravitational pull toward the lid to your pot is magnetic, unchanging and immovable.

I'm thinking that for me it would be more like Because if I ended up with someone like Gary Busey it'd light myself on fire!

My thoughts exactly Spider! At first this sounds like a good idea but what if you imprint with someone disgusting? What if it were Buttcrack Santa? Before his untimely demise, of course. I think I'd rather have some control in who is going to be the pot to my lid.

Mr. Ginger imprints on me almost every night. Oh wait... are we talking about the same thing?


Monday, July 27, 2009

Hat Trick

Okay so many of you thought I was delusional when I (and others) suggested that this was the same hat:

Well, how about we get the truth from the source herself. Starting at 0:31. Kristen looks at Rob and says "you're wearing my hat!" and playfully punches him.

Now that we have that out of the way, anyone want to speculate on the absolute awkwardness between Rob and Nikki?

What do we need to speculate about? Rob has clearly moved on when Nikki hasn't.

And very good detective work, Spank, for the Robsten hat. *bowing down to your awesomeness*

I wish Summit would just let them come out about it already! Why all the secrecy? I think they'd both look less strung stressed out if they were allowed to let their feelings show. Besides, it would make Spank the happiest superheroine ever! *ducking from Spider*

For crying out loud, not this again? Spank, I will publicly humiliate myself and kiss your ass for ALL of eternity if you can give me this one piece of actual proof that would put this whole issue to bed for me. I remember seeing a picture of him wearing that hat and thinking it was kinda lame that he never removed the little round "official MLB" sticker from the underside of the lid. So, you show me that little sticker on Kristen Stewart's hat and I will never deny Robsten again! Go Nonsten!

It is so flippin' obvious that they are together. I think it's awesome. They are cute, single and gorgeous. Also they seem to really make each other laugh, smile and have a great ease with one another. They are together.

I have said my peace! Robsten!

I'm going to throw up - who are you? What did you do to that girl I fell in love with? All those words up above, the defensiveness, the "tude". It's because you can't handle the truth! And you cannot find my proof.

So sad...

Spider, I think it's time to accept the truth. Robsten IS. They share tees and now hats - there's just no denying it anymore.

The girl you fell in love with is still here. She just has her eyes wide open.

I give you proof over and over and you refute it. No matter what: the same shirts, the hat, the eye sex, the morning after the MTV Movie Awards, them texting each other during the Comic Con Panel...

I suspect that I could present a sex tape and you would just say it was their body doubles. Which makes me wonder, do you think when they are finished with their lovemaking Rob whispers "you are my life now..." in Kristen's ear?

What the...?! Seriously, Spank, did you EVER make love when you were nineteen?

*watching Spider*

*turning head to watch Spank*

Rob is 23! The man sings beautifully folksy and tormented love songs.... he strums his guitar with those long fingers stroking the chords and he massages the piano keys, tickling them ever so lightly ... Yeah, Rob knows ALL about the art lovemaking and he's schooling Kristen like a good teacher would.

Well, according to your "evidence" a sex tape would show the two of them sitting on the same bed "sexting" each other ... modern love, ahhh.