Friday, June 19, 2009

Protecting Rob's Ass-ets!

I'm thinking the bodyguards should start using tasers. And I can ask my brother if he still has that BB machine gun. Won't cause permanent damage but should deter them.

Uh yeah... because the pinch-move? That's not really working out.

Yeah, it looks like she kinda likes being pinched. Hussy.

So, yeah, not cool AT ALL. This really disgusts me. I know we are all enormous fans of Rob Pattinson but who in their right mind would chase the poor guy or start screaming at him. We all make our jokes on here but I would NEVER harass someone like that. If this keeps up the kid is going to have a nervous breakdown before Eclipse is in the can. He doesn't need us to protect him per se, but I do think some League Justice is in order!

These nut jobs that make Rob's life a living hell in public should be sentenced to the following punishment deliverable via The League of Extraordinary Twilighters. Keep in mind, I'm trying to think of punishments without reverting to my Sicilian instincts. It's not easy. But here's what I think is VERY fair.

They should have their homes raided and all Rob Pattinson or Twilight related items shall be removed; they shall be banned from viewing any future Rob Pattinson movies; they should be forced to write a 900 page book that says "I love Jacob" over and over and over. Handwritten, of course. AND then they should be screamed at in the face by hysterical women and chased through the streets for an entire month.

Now I think that's getting off quite easy, if you ask me. However, should my anger get the best of me I'm liable to gouge their eyes out, pull out every last strand of skank hair from their heads and anchor them to the ocean floor ALIVE. What? Too much?

LOL Spider. But tell us what you really think about it.

These miscreants who stalk Rob Pattinson and physically assault him are not "fans" or "Twihards" or even "Robsessed." They are desperate irrational psychopaths who have no sense of basic humanity. YES, Rob is an object of desire for us all but he is not an object. YES, we all talk about how we want to do things to him that are illegal in many countries but we would never EVER do them without invitation (Rob, if you're reading this... you only have to ask).

People, Rob got hit by a car to avoid these set-stalking freaks. Granted, it was a NYC taxi and they have been known to aim for people but still... It happened because he is under seige and trying to escape. Clearly, this has gotten entirely out of control and it is time we responsible Twilighters take action.

Now I like where Spider's going with how to handle these skanks. As you know, I too am Sicilian. We don't take kindly to disrespect. In fact, there are severe consequences for those who don't toe the line. So in the spirit of The Godfather, I'll make these bitches an offer they can't refuse: Stay the hell away from Rob Pattinson. Far, far away. In sum, bitches, you're nothing to me now. You're not a Twihard, you're not a fan. I don't want to know you or what you do. I don't want to see you at the hotels, movie sets or bars. I don't want you near my great state of New York. In fact, stay out of the Tri-State area. When you see New Moon in theaters, I want to know a day in advance, so I won't be there. You understand? Good.

Okay, first, don't mess with the Sicilians on the League. Or the redhead, for that matter. Trust me on this one. As for me, I may be small, but I'm quick (and I have two Sicilians and a redhead to back me up). And, seriously people, we need to respect Rob.

I, for one, don't want to see Rob go the way of that hot guy from Sixteen Candles (you know, Jake Ryan). He was so overwhelmed by the pressure he is now a recluse who makes furniture. Do we want this same fate for our Rob? Not me. I want to see him make many more films... so I can continue to watch his amazing ass work as an actor.

Or how about Vanilla Ice who ended up running a bicycle shop?

... and I bet he's as successful a bike shop owner as he was a rapper. At least Rob has talent which means he'll likely end up like Marlon Brando, a recluse living in Tahiti with a harem of women.... wait.... The League could do Rob Tahiti.



Valerie(momof3crazykids) said...

OK, those chicks are out of control! Did this really happen or was it part of his new movie. I've been kind of out of it, living on the beach this week.
Did he get hit by a car also? Please tell me it aint so!
I feel so bad for Rob. Seriously those chicks just need a swift kick in the you know what!

Valerie(momof3crazykids) said...

Yikes, now that I look at the pics again, they freaking have twilight bags. (not that there is anything wrong with that) so this wasn't filming. Ok chickadees GET A LIFE! What made them think they could hang all over him?

twilighter_87 said...

Valerie: yes it really did happen -attacked by crazy people...

and as far as i know he got hit by a car, he is OK, and it was not any fans fault...but his bodyguards or someone pushed him on a little too fast I read accident at least..

and I completely agree with u leauge...they shoul not be allowed to be fans anymore...and I kinda like ur methods ;)

Chrissi said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
kmoye said...

harrassing Rob + shorts with your pockets sticking out the bottom = skank
nuff said

oh and do you see Rob actually "posing" with the one chic, he is such a nice guy!

Chrissi said...

It's scary to think what could happen to him because of the pressure these obsessed people cause. Too many actors who had promising futures went crazy, went to jail, or became recluses because of the pressure, and these people don't seem to realise that it is DIRECTLY because of their obsessive behaviour that the people they claim to 'love' go off-the-rails. What's worse for him is that he's a shy guy who has never been comfortable with the public, and he's trying to handle things that most actors only get sporadically. Plus other actors get to walk down the streets normally, but if he walks somewhere, or has a cigarette (naughty Rob), or talks to a girl *shocked gasp from the audience* it's front page news everywhere. Now, I love a good pic of Rob at an awards event, or sneak peeks at New Moon, and of course if he wants to randomly take off his shirt I won't say no to those pics, but seriously, something really bad could happen to him. What about earlier when he got clipped by that taxi? Regardless of the fact that he wasn't injured, how often does that actually happen to other people? I say that the public reprimand for these girls is not enough, especially since they're probably relishing their 12 minutes of fame, and are doing some weird stuff of the pics with them and Rob.

Don't worry Rob, the League, and us, their followers, respect you enough to want to keep you away from those girls. If you went near us we wouldn't go crazy... ;)

Lady Hale said...

My question is this...

Do those girls seriously think that they're 'all that' since they practically molested Rob in public?!?! Cos if they do...THEY'RE MESSED UP!!


sakixry said...

You know the R-Team got your backs, right? And I for sure ... are not small...

Yes, those skanks should be banned from anything that has to do with Twilight or Rob. They shouldnt be allowed to get near a mile radious from Rob but guys...

I think Summit is actually enjoying the free publicity... if they wanted to protect Rob a little better... they would hire 5 more bodyguards, put some street thingys there and wouldnt let him walk around like that. This is really B/S...

And look at those skanks... they are actually smiling... what the hell do they think they have accomplished? Yeaaah! Here! A golden dildo for you... geeez...

LOL @ Spiders punishments and especially "...they should be screamed at in the face by hysterical women and chased through the streets for an entire month".

Love you all!
sakixry aka lickhimright of the RavisHim Team

RobsNaughtyGirl said...

These little tramps are in serious need of crazy drugs, they are worse then the evil papz, and thats a hard thing to do. They almost make me embarrassed to say I'm a Rob fan, because then people will think I'm as insane as they are.... I say almost because I'll never deny my lust for that man :) I've always wondered how I would react if I ever had the chance to meet him, and I can honestly say, thank you LORD, I would NOT act like these horomone crazed children and scare the man, I mean seriously, it's girls like that thet will turn our darling Rob gay. I've said it before and I'll say it again, we should turn the crazy stalker fans on the stalker papz, and then Rob might get 5 minutes of peace.

Jen said...

I'm nmore than a little Robsessed, but there's no chance I'd invade someones right to walk down a street that way!!

Maybe it's just me, but does no body else think publicity when they see that last pic? I can't help but think that they look too posed or prepped or something of a similar persuasion :)

Just doesn't add up, why weren't the girls mobbing him in other locations? (or are the crazies confined to NY??)

Erin said...

League I agree with you completely and your methods of punishment!

Seriously we are all adults on here (at least I hope we are) and would act very civilized and respectful if we ever met Rob. And not like the raging lunatics that he has so far encountered.

There is no reason for him to be STALKED and yes, I see this as STALKING! Leave the poor guy alone and let him do his job (which he is amazing at) and enjoy his life. I don't want him to go crazy or become a recluse!

We all want to see more of Rob and his acting in the future.

Now someone punish those crazy GIRLS (yes GIRLS...not Twilighters or women), use the body double they already have and set-up some mock filming sites for these places and stick the double there. Let the crazies attack the double, NOT ROB! said...

Good Morning League!

I totally agree, these crazies need to be stopped. GAWD, it makes me sick that they only think of themselves....

It is stalkingm, I agree with you, we want Rob to stay in acting but I wouldn't blame him if he quit. I pray he doesn't.

Those "girls" who say they love Rob have a very bad way of showing him! *muttering explicits*

@Spider, League!!!!
Let the punishment begin!

We are behind you totally 110%! for Ravishim Team, sisters to the League!!! ALWAYS!

Anonymous said...

srsly, Rob needs to dump those useless chunks and hire some female Sicilians/bodyguards. Can you imagine how tough it must be to keep the skanks off of him without actually hurting any of them (and avoiding the inevitable accusations of sexual harrassment/ assault?)

I propose that Summit hire Rob some tough Zenas/Leaguers who will have no probs laying hands on young stalkers and "persuading" them to lay off Rob.

Blondie said...

I agree with all of yas, a hope he doesn't stop his acting now and because of this!!

Because there pic is everywhere now, wherever there seen twilight fans are gona hate them and shout abuse at them!! Hope there happy with themselves!!

Cheers for the blog!!

robin(me) said...

Oh League, I'm so glad that you posted this!

Oh yes, that pic of them smiling, not good for them now! And i'll be one to shout, let me tell you...nodding @spider!

I so so agree with you, and all the League!!!!it's just pathetic and so disrespectful..Who doesn't desire Rob??? but damn we don't ATTACK the guy. OMG! We could never do this. I hope he knows that there are true fans out there that care about him!

@Sakixry, Reelhimin, R Team
We ARE forever true to the League forever....we are here for you! YES, name it... we are there!

Love you!
robin(me) aka zipperdown from Ravishim Team....

Toeknee said...

seriously...who attacks people like that? Little hussies that's who! When I saw that I was completely disgusted, no normal person does this.

While the cab hitting Rob wasn't directly related to any psycho fans, it could happen in the future as he is so desperately trying to get away from them he might get hurt. I mean look at Princess Di, she died running from the papz. People need to think about their actions and how it adversely affects people. Let the guy just live his life and continue to bring the rest of us happiness from just watching him on screen.

If I were Rob, I would have slapped a ho silly, no joke. I'm not one for men hitting women but those are not women, those are hoebeasts from hell. Real Women don't act like that.


Lori said...

Those pictures make me kind of sad. I feel bad that the poor guy can't even walk down the street.

I lived in Los Angeles for five years and I NEVER approached a celebrity because I was very aware that they were just trying to buy jeans, or groceries, or go see a film.

I would hope that all the devotees of Leaguers would have a little more respect for Handsome Rob. :)

StilltheLurker said...

Oh Lord have mercy!

League, I'm behind you 100%, I'll bitchslap the fans and the papz, too!

Especially if they make this beautiful guy quit!


and I thought I was strange? *sheesh*

you're the home girl! you go girl!


I said this on the R Team's blog...

I'm getting Jane and we're heading off to NY! (wanna come?) There will be no more tolerance for this type of behavior!

We love and respect you RPattz! Please stay safe!

Leave Rob Alone said...

check this out :)

Wheaty's Girl Creations hearts twilight! said...

I do believe if it keeps up he will walk know..we may have to find a new Edward..makes me sick that people treat him that way...yeah not fans...crazy nut jobs...I do love spiders punishment..hale yeah!!!!!!!! and that isnt even good enough for their sorry well..u know...maybe rob should quit smiling while women are groping him and choking him...maybe someone would take notice that he doesnt like it..but then again..those women..they would have still done it..he could be very upset..they wouldnt care...if i was part of the fans that caused him to get hit..i would run and hide forever..they should be so embarrassed!!!!!! Hell i was embarrassed cause i wrote some goofy thing about gil on twitter and he replied..i wanted to go hide..haha got caught flirting a little bit..oops..i if i caused him to get hit by a car..time to shoot never try and stalk rob again if i were those crazies...some people never learn...i guess..

MystifyMe said...

I've taken today to put things into perspective.
I received an email from my pal Sakixry.Thanks for the honesty girl.Love ya!
I was shaking and was physically sick over all of this.
That would probably put me into the psycho bitch category.Yet I would never ever harm him or invade his space. Even if the opportunity presented itself, I might wave or shake his hand, but would walk away(kicking myself).
I value him as an individual and a talent. Although I joke that he is one of my staple food groups, ie :My McHappy Meal, I would never
disrepect him.I want him around to admire for a long time.Sobeit Rob, unless I bump into you by accident
I will never camp on your doorstep, or attack you in public, or even think about it.
You are too precious.Stay that way and don't let the assholes get ya down.

Toeknee said...

@Lurker, hell yes I will come, those hoebeasts need a nice asswhoppin and Im up for it. LOL. Tell me when and IM so there!

Those girls make me sick and are a horrible representation of the real fans. Thats a load of crap that they would do this to him.

Anonymous said...

Okay League,

You are dead on. This is getting out of control. If necessary you might need to assemble reenforcements to help protect "The package". I'll gladly volunteer, and we can handle these poor misguided phenes sicilian style.

Side note Spider,

Being forced to write I love Jacob may not be a good punishment. Those new abs,pecs, and pretty teeth..ummm (sorry I digress) have me a little distracted these days. Maybe they should be forced to write I love Mike Newton 900 times.

P.S. I miss Meadow. Will anyone of super vixens be finding good fluff for us to read?

- The Twilightdieheart