Sunday, April 5, 2009

Storytime With Meadow: Wide Awake Edition

Wide Awake.
I'm willing to bet that half of our readers just got all tingly and excited that I even mentioned this fanfic. It has a cult following to rival Twilight itself and Angstgoddess003 has the writing talent to back it up. It has a fan club on Live Journal and on FaceBook. People have had shirts made. I've heard WA called “What Twilight should have been!” and that's the one point that I don't agree on. Not because I don't think it's good, it's just so different that I hesitate to call it a Twilight fan-fiction. It's the anti-Twilight. Where Twilight is fantastic and supernatural Wide Awake is gritty and real. Edward is NO gentleman and Bella is not hunted by vampires but by her emotional demons. I love Twilight for it's innocence and chaste longing (at least until we get to BD. Then I want my longing to be less... chaste.) But where SM gives us fade-to-black AG gives us blow jobs. So, here's my warning: Wide Awake is dark, angsty, depressing, graphic, and sometimes shocking, and is TOTALLY worth your time. To convince you, here are a few excerpts:

God bless Rosalie. She huffed and tossed the magazine across the room, startling Alice and I as we shifted our attention to her. “This is why I never talk to girls about blow jobs.” She spoke in annoyance as she darted her eyes back and forth between us. “Someone always ends up crying and running away from me.” She sniffed indignantly.
-Wide Awake Chapter 35
I mentally manifested the entire concept of the female orgasm into a unicorn. Yes. A unicorn. A very pretty, white, majestic, non existent mythical creature that everyone talks about, but you never actually see first hand. That is… unless that hand belongs to a certain Edward Cullen. It was like nothing I had ever felt before. Well, technically it was nothing I had ever felt before. I wondered if Edward even realized he granted me two pretty white unicorns.
-Wide Awake, Chapter 33

You KNOW you're gonna read it now, aren't you? *wicked grin*

I have never read fan-fic. Not because I am adverse to it but just never considered it. Reading this review has me convinced because there is nothing I like more than dark, angsty, depressing, graphic and sometimes shocking storylines ... I also like the idea of Edward Cullen's hand and, um, "unicorns." I must give props to Mr. Spank... he's been known to hand out more than a couple unicorns in one night himself and there was a fade-to-black this one time, but that was just me losing consciousness. Take THAT Stephenie "Chaste" Meyer. Now, Meadow -- link, PLEASE?!!?!?!?!!!

Of course Spank! It wasn't my intent to withhold the goodness. Here it is:

Scroll down on the left and you'll see all the chapters for Wide Awake. Right now there are 47 of them, and I believe that AG says it'll be completed in 50, so sadly it's almost made it to the end of it's run. AG just started a new fic, however, so I'll keep you guys posted on that one too. ;)

Fan fiction kind of weirds me out. I mean someone else is writing stories about characters I've come to know and love. All I can think about is SM's characters wouldn't do that.

No, no, no -- Ginger... what they are doing is giving us the Edward that acts like a man, not a doormat. I mean who among us did not want to shake his cold, marble body when he was all cool like ice over Bella wanting to name their son Edward JACOB? Oh yeah... let's try that on Mr. Spank and see what he would have said about me wanting to name our son after some other guy that I was "conflicted" about. Be a man... even an undead man.. I think I need blood pressure medication. Sorry. Continue...

See, I take the opposite view Ginger. I feel like people are using the shell of these characters to create their own stories. The Edward Cullen in Wide Awake is VERY different than Edward in Twilight. So are the rest of the characters. I think some people need a jumping-off point to fuel their imaginations. Like I said, this isn't Twilight or Twilight rehashed through a different perspective. You could change the names and places on this story and it'd bear no resemblance to Twilight. Which is part of what I love about it. It could stand alone. But I'm not complaining about envisioning Twilight-Movie-Edward (aka RP) while I'm reading. ;)

If the story could stand on it's own if the characters have different names, than why doesn't the author just give them different names? If the person is a really great writer (and it sounds like she is) and the story is nothing like Twilight, why did she use the names of SM's characters? People like her work so much, she would probably get a chance to get her work published if her characters had different names.

Because if Edward was named Alfred he wouldn't be Edward. It also wouldn't be called fan-fic, unless the author was a fan of her own fiction, which I guess she is since it is fiction about fiction for which she is a fan. Okay, wait... I think I am a little confused. Did I hit my head?

Personally, I think it's two-fold. Some people can't help but "think" about how this would be different or what if this, etc and then they write it down and then *poof* next thing you know you've got a fanfic. Also, you have a built-in audience. Chances are if AG hadn't made this a Twilight FanFic I never would've heard of it. She wouldn't have gotten the amazing feedback to spur her to continue. It's kinda cyclical like that. I don't view fanfics as somehow degrading the source material, but as more of an homage. "This work was influenced by..."

You've got a good point. I was thinking of them more as a copying someone else's work vs. an homage to the author and original work. I wonder what SM thinks about fanfic. Do we have any fanfiction that is just like SM's writing, that fits the character's personality but tells us what happened (in detail) at Isle Esme? I might be willing to switch over to the dark side start reading fan fiction.

Stephenie Meyer has no reason to take issue with fan-fic because chances are if she had told us what happened in Isle Esme we would not be compelled to "think" about it (dream about it, fantasize about it, role-play with our husband, including the use of feathers, ice cubes and hot wax...).

Shh... don't bother me with League business. I'm reading.



Total Fanpires said...

I WOULD read it
But im too busy with OTHER stuff.
but i might get around to it....

ok wat the heck NOW!

Ninja Fanpire said...

Hahaha, I like the titles of the chapters. Gah, I do not have time to read 47 chapters! I personally prefer my own fanfics,
1. Because they DO fit with SMeyers style.
2. I'm the weird person that prefers the fade to black. So my stuff is not dirty.
3. I have only written from Bella's POV once, I prefer to write from Alice's, though I've done a large Carlisle series.

Ninja Fanpire said...

Haha, darn, I took too long typing and missed first post!

Mrs. P. said...

@Meadow--How did you know I got all tingly in my special no-no spot when you mentioned Wide're good, or you've been reading too much me! Anyway, I love Wide Awake, it was the third or fourth FF story I read and I love DarkWard, I want him to give me "Unicorns" all night long ahem what was I saying...?

oh yeah, I love that you are reading it, and not staying Twi-Pure, I love the concept of these stories as an homage, and I love when a writer really does the characters justice. That is why I'm all for AU/AH fics--these tend to stand alone, and only rely on the shell of stephenie's story.

@Spank, Ginger, and Spider
Please please read this is all kinds of Angst, lust, and love, but If I was to rec. just one story to the FF uninitiated this one would be it!!

@meadow...if you ever need someone to talk things over with...just tweet me ok girl!! we can have a deep & Philosophical "literary discussion" ANYTIME

Valerie(momof3crazykids) said...

I have not read WA yet. Though have heard about it a lot. I have though read the fan fix for the fade to black parsvof BD. Whoa! Is all I can say!

Mrs. P. said...

@Ginger...I've heard this gets the point across --no fade to black here--

kmoye said...

I finished WA yesterday and thought it was a very good story that could totally stand on its own. the use of the same character names as twilight gives the reader a sense that we already know these people.
and its dark, very dark at times and really smutty too.
A good read!

OCD Sufferer said...

Ok, I have to comment (and hurry before I get caught, lol) I tried to read WA, but I just can't. I like SM's Edward and I can't get over it. I love how gentlemanly he is and I like how it is PG-13...HOWEVER, that being said, I *needed* to "hear" what happened on Isle Esme, so I found a fanfic to read. Mrs. P posted it: Warmth. It is soooooo good. I am a goody girl, I don't like raunchy stuff, and this one is actually not too bad. Granted, we are talking about sex here and you can't exactly replay a sex scene and NOT get somewhat smutty, so yeah, this has also has THE COTTAGE! That gets pretty stinking good!
I have also read Baby Steps. It isn't about sex, it is about the pre-wedding "practice" lol. It has it from BPOV and EPOV. She isn't done yet, she left it at a part that is killing me to finish, but it is really good too. I feel so bad reading these, like I am some pervert, but I don't have a great imagination, I need a push in the right direction, and this satiates my thirst! (pun intended)
But, I just can't read those where Edward isn't Edward...I tried. Doesn't work for me :( There was another one called Submissive, I think, that everyone raved about, but he is a dirty, dirty man, lol. I like my 108-year-old-virgin-till-his-wedding Edward. *Grin*

robin(me) said...

UH Spank
Somehow I'd knew you'd say all those things about Edward's hands....mmmm. I love the books as is...BUT that doesn't mean that I was happy about all the FADE to BLACKS... Yes, I read WA and I have two feelings about it:
1) It did satisfy my curiousity *uh hem* about what Edward really might be feeling. Come on, he was 17 for 90 bloody years...he must have felt something! Right?
2) But, I couldn't see sweet, naive and somewhat (duh?) Bella doing those things. I SAID sweet BELLA not sweet kstewpid. *vigourously shaking head*

Oh Meadow, as I read through Twilight, New Moon - I felt as you...this was sweet. Then Eclipse got me a little bit thinking: ok, Edward wants to marry her but a little PRACTICE wouldn't KILL you, Edward. AND then BD...yes too chaste for me being a mature woman who likes a little spice! So yeah I can understand fan fiction. I thought of writing my own.

Submissive is way way out there for even me to handle. Got halfway through and even my computer froze up. A little too much spice for this grampire!

BeCullen said...

All I can say is that Meadow has brought me to the dark side and I love it. hehe I will be checking out WA fo sho. hehe

Ginger Swan said...

@OCD Sufferer, sounds like you and I are on the same page. I like Edward just the way he is in SM's books, but I do want to know what happens in the fade to black (in detail). I'll definitely check out "Warmth" that @Mrs. P left the link for!

sakixry said...

I haven't read Wide Awake yet because somebody... I think it was a blodn superhero called Meadow... tipped me off that there is a fanfic that writes about our beloved RP (the real RP, not Edward) and a 33 year old redhead woman... Yes! This COULD be me! So I was busy reading this one... But now I'm almost done with it and WILL read wide awake!
I do love fanfic! I've read a lot on and Twilighted too. I liked "Warmth" VERY much! It was very sexy, graphic sometimes.. hmmm... not that I didn't like it.
I do also believe that if this wonderful writer Angstgoddess wouldn't use SM's character names, her story wouldn't be known. And I DON'T believe that the writers who use SM's names try to copy her or even get to be known because they do. They just love the characters, love Twilight and start to write driven by this.
Another great story I have posted in the past is "Something wicked this way comes" which you can find in which is also something COMPLETELY DIFFERENT than Twilight. It is Hi-la-ri-ous! It's not done yet but when I read this I am laughing really hard. If I wouldn't look up fanfiction about Twilight, I would have never read it.
So, will go search for EC to give me some Unicorns too *wink*

robnutmeg said...

Oh Meadow, I waited for this day...

Let's just say that I never heard of fanfics until Twilight madness came knocking at my computer monitor. Now talk about the dark side. YUM. Yes, I had the same exact thoughts...UNICORN and magical EC hands.

I only have time for reading rated M or NC 17. The nature of the beast that's within me. *hangs head in shame*

Oh BeCullen,
Loving the dark side is delicious. You'll be hooked in no time flat.

Submissive is quite intense *evil wink* but I admit, I've been reading it and find myself getting chills. And I did like warmth but frankly, I lean more towards HOT.

Now come on girl. You liked it and!

I need a cold shower. Chow. said...

@Ginger Swan
I love that you love EC the way he is but even you have to admit that he's kinda wah wah when it comes to what he really wants to do with Bella! I mean look what her blood scent did to him!

Don't they call robgasms "little death"....just saying. I'd be willing to go out on a limb and get some of the unicorn action even if it meant death. Just thinking like Bella, keeping it real.

I just wanted EC to be a normal 17year old -- especially while I was reading Eclipse and all of sudden you almost get there when EC saids.!

And then SM takes it all back...there was that "need" I had so thank the Lord for fanfics b/c I almost threw the book out of my 5story apartment building to the streets below.

u would enjoy the darkward...let's talk sometime i can lead u down the dark path

@robin(me), OCD
u know i love u, right? but don't be so afraid of letting ur inner UNICORN out to play....*wink*

I love ur style girl. i have new spankfictions when ur ready!

twi'ing2analyze said...

@The League and everyone!

Uh LOVE to analyze (coz that's what I do) fanfics of all types.

hit the target

I can understand ur desire to keep EC - Edward. So that is why I think u should read about Rob....

Try reading the fanfic about Kristen and Rob...while playing the Song, Don't Trust Me by 3OH!3 on ur Ipod or any other music playing device. Now that will just simply KILL you! So that's what I'm doing these days. *MEOW*

sakixry said...

@oh: you got to tell me what the darkward is but I do think I will like it!! :)))
where can we "talk"? LOL
@twi'ing2analyze: Which fanfic about Kristen and Rob? where is the link?

beesue said...

Good Morning League!
I can see from above comments that some are luvin' naughty fanfic and some can't really get "into" it! Can understand both points of view.

I luv the Twilight series and the innocent naughtiness but it WAS written as a young adult series. Being a mature(well I think I am) married, mother of two grown sons it just left me "wanting"! I think this is why the fanfic works. I read Isle Esme first and then went on from there.

"Wide Awake" is my favorite of all I have read. I luv dark Edward and even though he has that dirty mouth - when he calls Bella "MY GIRL" for the first time - I melted. You watch him falling for her and protecting her and you see through that "tough, no caring" facade.

The only other thing: these stories should come with a "Surgeon General Warning" because they are so addicting. I have become a night owl! Up til 3 or 4 am because I can not stop!
My laptop is now attached to my LAP and my cat is always looking at me funny!

twi'ing2analyze said...

Sorry been busy reading.... Here is the fanfic about Kristen & Rob - it's one of the MANY out there but it's the one I'm currently reading....

RIGHT on girl! *nice kitty*

twi'ing2analyze said...

READ w/ caution, OK? Just saying.

BEESUE's Surgeon General Warning really should be on it.

YOU'll see, believe me. *evil grin*

Must get back to reading now.


robnutmeg said...

Why u are a naughty girl, aren't u?

I practically had a heart attack reading the first page of Life Goes On.

*it certainly does - tremble, tremble*

AND that song you mentioned is PERFECT for the Kristen and Rob we know now. I wonder if it was written for kstewpid? Could be her theme song. I think that should have it on the movie, yes?

robin(me) said...

3 words

Robnutmeg called me frantically speaking in what I thought might have been a different language b/c the only words I understood were I.can't.breathe!

She read, you see, Life Goes On. Ok so how bad could this be, I thought...This is robnutmeg - my crazy and anti-shy friend turned speechless b/c of a fanfiction?

NO way! So I read the first chapter.....Did I say OH MY GOD?

So ladies if you are brave, plenty of wine (perhaps something a lot stronger...), a man nearby - go ahead a read it. NOT for the faint of heart! WARNING

OH and the song is priceless. Is this not kstewpid's theme song?

I googled part of the lyrics just for Twilightheaded....enjoy girls...

"Black dress with the tights underneath,
I got the breath of the last cigarette on my teeth,
And shes an actress (actress),
But she ain't got no need.
Shes got money from her parents in a trust fund back east.
T-t-t-tongues always pressed to your cheeks,
While my tongue is on the inside of some other girls teeth,
T-tell your boyfriend if he says hes got beef,
That I'm a vegetarian and I ain't fucking scared of him.

She wants to touch me (Woah),
She wants to love me (Woah),
She'll never leave me (Woah, woah, oh, oh),
Don't trust a ho,
Never trust a ho,
Won't trust a ho,
Won't trust me.

Shush girl shut your lips,
Do the Hellen Keller and talk with your hips.
I said, Shush girl shut your lips,
Do the Hellen Keller and talk with your hips.
I said, Shush girl shut your lips,
Do the Hellen Keller and talk with your hips."

My favorite part in this little diddy is: SHUT YOUR LIPS (puleeze!)

Spank Ransom said...


I'm ready, friend - Spankify me. :) said...

@Spank Ransom

Ok you asked for it!

Scroll down - you'll see Twilight 2 keep scrolling to start with Twilight 1. (I'd read that one first b/c it ties in w/ the 2nd one)

It's really cool b/c it's like a part of the books. it even tells you the page it's adding on to.... *eyebrow wiggling*

HAVE FUN, spank. Let me know whatcha think! Tell me if that just doesn't read your mind when you are reading the books....

Mystify Me said...

Freakin' awesome lyrics girl!
Can anyone sing?? And pleez don't anyone say Kristen(Joan Jett) aherm..
I'm not against smut perse, but I will leave Twilight as it is, and leave for the depths and crevices of my own filthy wee noggen.
In public I prefer to be more fancy-free(cough) *rolls eyes* such as when my friends and I watched the Haunted Airman, and Rob licked his lips whilst composing a letter to Auntie Dearest (Julia), and we all screamed "WHOA!!!" in unison, and had to re-watch, well more than 6 or seven or more times.Lmao
Of course upon reading THE END on the last page of BD, I WAS HORRIFIED and continued to my trivial little wasteland I call my head.;)
No one will ever know what really happened in that quaint cottage, but moi!;)p.s. Nessie went to DayCare rather speedily.;)

sakixry said...

@twi'ing: i just read the 2 chapters of the story and i really didn't like it... everything happens too fast and the getting pregnant idea is also kinda stupid for me... sorry... have you read meadow's suggestion of last week? "I Love L.A."? That was a nice one! No Kristen, just Rob. said...

OOOh love that song. It's perfect for Rob to sing to that twit kstewpid. thanks robin(me) for the lyrics.

i understand why u don't like Life goes on...i didn't b/c it's about rob & kstewpid. i hate that piss ant! i can't see them together at all and it pissed me off. Now my imagination did run away with me a little and ... *wink* Rob does have a way with his "unicorn"...and he said he's nothing like Edward. humpf!

are u ok girl? said...

how's the reading going?

Mrs .P. said...

I just read that Life Goes On fic...all 2 chapters of it...but there was no plot just smut--and despite what others might think about me ;) that's not all I look for in a Fic!-- Also it was really poorly written with loads of typos and misspellings--as a ''self-appointed'' FICXPERT I would not recommend that story. --just my $.02 for what it's worth :)

twi'ing2analyze said...

@Mrs. P, sakixry, oh

I have to agree with you. Life Goes On was really off. I was just starting to read it when I posted about it not realizing that it really wasn't that good...alot of smut (did i say a lot of smut?)And it made me angry, too!

Sorry everyone!!! there are way better ones out there to feast on. I'm sure you won't trust me if I recommended any others...*hangs head in shame*

But thank u for liking the song. *smirk*

robnutmeg said...

sure, i'm good. i had a couple of glasses of wine...

i, too, read LGOn..and I immediately replaced Kstewpid's name with my least for the first chapter....but the next chapter...eeewwww...even I couldn't imagine myself there.

still love ya here. and LOVE the song! been playing it all day.

@mystify me
the thought of kstewpid singing this actually cracks me up. it's her song!

Mystify Me said...

BED NOW..SRDs..Smutty Rob Dreams....

Mystify Me said...

ME...near Toronto Canada.

Meadow Cliffdiver said...

*wicked grin* It's very hard to resist Darkward, isn't it ladies? I'm on a few other AH (all-human) stories right now but do you want me to do a review that sticks more with the SM model for next Sunday (*cough* Warmth*cough*)? And I make no apologies, I enjoy the "smut." Off to have smutty dreams of my own...

Christy said...

I love WA. I love Edward's dirty dirty mouth in it. I think if she had named the characters something else, it would have never been read. And I like that I can imagine Rob as the Edward that she portrays. LOVE it. Have seen a few unicorns because of it ;)

Resisting Edward on ff is good one, too. No vampire stuff there, just angsty teens.

Mrs. P. said...

I am all for leaving Stephenie Meyer's little bubble intact we'd hate to get little Eddie and Bellie smudged...
I say go for AH stories
*tweet me if you need any new smutty suggestions* ;)
--and can I say that it is totally S.M.'s fault that we're in this deep, if she had just finished Midnight Sun, I would have never fallen so far...ok maybe not never...but it would have taken at least a few more months!!

@ twi'ing2analyze
didn't mean to attack need to hang head, I often send people off to read stories after only a few chapters too, only to find out they aren't that great...just thought I'd give all the ladies here a heads up...that's all!!
I'm always on the lookout for a good story, and will still trust your judgement...

sakixry said...

@Mrs.P.: exactly what I think too!!! I have no problem to imagine them together - not that I like to do it, I prefer to imagine myself with him *grin* - but this story was only smut and nothing else...

sakixry said...

@twi'ing: of course we will trust you!! This happens TO ALL of us *wink*

@Meadow: smut is not bad as long as it is well written and has something to offer... I can think by myself like: comes through the door, crushes lips on me, throw away all of my clothes, pull down his zipper... etc. Warmth is a very nicely smutty written story, I Love L.A. too... but not this thing... baeeehhh!!!

songirl said...

Okay. Here I go down the rabbit hole again when I have a paper due and work in the a.m and should be sleeping.
I am on the fan fic 12 step program and don't sleep, ignore hubby and children-thankfully they are all old enough to feed themselves...
We have said it before...Steph is no Jane Austin and never pretended to be. I prefer to think of her as the screen writer who gave us Edward and by extension, Rob (Thank God!). Alot of fan fic is crap and a lot is way better than Twilight. That being said the ummm, tingly feelings the Saga inspired has created a lot of energy that is being unleashed in many directions. Warning! all are for Mature readers only because we all know what happens at the fade and I don't want somebody else's hand over my eyes.

My number one Rob fan fic choice is I Love L.A. on Twilighted.

I also love Wide Awake...very good writing, lots of heat and Angst.

Current favorite for cool factor and poetry is Tropic of Virgo-So good!!-The Cullens the way we wish they were written.

I actually don't love the vampire gore and have no patience for the werewolves, so I prefer all human.

Good Bella, Bad Bella
The List
Midnight Desire
The Red Line (very long, lots of angst, very very smutty - fair warning)
The Office- (angry sex-nervous giggle)

Once you start reading, you can't stop...

songirl said...

Also, a note about whether Steph reads fan fic..She does and actually her current Beta or friend/informal editor was a fan fic writer that Steph reviewed and complimented on her version of Midnight Sun that she HIRED! Her name is Alphie.

sakixry said...

well thank you songirl! as i do love "I Love L.A." too, I believe the other stories will be great too!! Thanks!

Anonymous said...

I agree with songirl that you have to read "The Office"......well written and just very good! The Twilight references are cleverly done.....Also, people bid $1400 in a charity auction for the authors of The Office to write chapters for them......I know this post is late, but they just posted a new chapter today, it is an unfinished ff, but this lemony goodness is too good not to share......

milfy goodness said...

Meadow - thank you for the excellent rec. As soon as I read this post 4 days ago I knew that I was going to get myself sucked into another fan fic - and it was totally worth the sleep deprivation!

I love the AU/AH stories because they take only the most basic aspects of SM's characters. Ladders by Marve (on Twilighted) is a another great one with a very Darkward.

My problem now is that the live journal site won't let me get past chapter 43 - and you said there are 4 more. I must know what happens!!!!

Leigh (Modern Mommy) said...

@milfy goodness I had to come to your rescue as soon as I saw your comment! Here are direct links:
Chapter 44:
Chapter 45 (part 1):
Chapter 45 (part 2):
Chapter 46 (part 1):
Chapter 46 (part 2):
Chapter 47:

Enjoy! :)

OCD Sufferer said...


Kristi said...

I"m doing a daily chapter by chapter review over at my blog. Check it out if you're intrested!