Saturday, February 14, 2009

What Would You Do?

Robert Pattinson's newest movie "Little Ashes" details the life of a young Salvador Dali and his love affair with the young poet Federico Garcia Lorca. This begs a very important question for the Twilight-Headed:




What would you do if you found out Robert Pattinson was gay? (Not that there's anything wrong with that...) Or, WORSE, would you do if Edward Cullen ended up being gay!?



You mean before Perez Hilton dresses up in nothing but a bow and mails himself to Rob? I'm pretty sure the earth would fall off its axis and the world would morph into utter chaos. Or maybe everyone on Team Edward's heads would explode. Kind of like in that movie, "Mars Attacks" where the aliens' heads explode when they play Tom Jones music. Yeah, like that.







I'm betting that's what Tanya thought after the umpteenth time she came on to Edward and he turned her down. I'm impressed he waited for Bella and all but I think if I'd been Edward I would've moved to Alaska by the time the 1960s hit. And if Rob Pattinson was gay I'd have two seperate but equal thoughts:


1. Figures.

2. I could turn him.




First I'd become a vampire (not sure exactly how to accomplish that in real life.) Second, I'd be a tracker so I could follow him around for eternity waiting for him to switch back. Hoping he would.









I'd become a man.








**Photo Courtesy Mr. Ginger and his mad Photoshop skills**

17 comments:

~Jamie said...

um.... uh...... um....

I guess I'd go guy... what other choice would there be?

Ninja Fanpire said...

Muchas gracias to Mr. Ginger!


No, heads wouldn't explode.

MOST of the fangirls would go into shock and then say "He's still hot anyway and I'm STILL going to stalk him."

JoJo_KK said...

Well, ladies, there is one other way that you could keep being a female and fill that gay niche a man needs..........it's all in the hips, can you touch your toes?

I'll leave you with that thought.........

Anonymous said...

Well, for one, there's always Jackson/Jasper, and let's face it, I find him so much hotter anyway (I think that may have something to do with Jackson's ability to bathe).

Plus, I'd be more than ok with it...if I could watch!! O.o oh a lil tmi...

Bramblemoon Farm said...

First off, DO NOT show that photo of Rob in the Dali movie. It creeps me out and I may turn gay myself if I have to see it again. Now, back to the topic. I would just live in my own little Denial World where he was still straight. It's a nice place where I am the Empress of my Universe and all is sparkly.

Bramblemoon Farm said...

By the way, that photo reminds me of the Youtube video Charlie, the Unicorn. Search for it and you'll see why. All I can say is "OMG Edward they took my fricken kidney".

Ninja Fanpire said...

@Brenda Jean: Yes it does. "Candy Mountain Charlie, Candy Mountain!"

JoJo_KK said...

Edward is hot with that erriness about him but if he turned out to be gay, oh well! See, my attraction really does lay with Carlisle.............ohh Dr Cullen, my chest feels so tight, can you place that cold, cold cold, ear of yours on my bossom and make sure I'm ok................

ems twilighters said...

I agree with Meadow about being impressed that he didn't just give in and hook up with Tanya...I guess you don't know what you are missing if you've never had it. Who knows, maybe Stepanie will write the whole series from Edward's perspective, and will write a 5th book where Edward comes out...nothing would surprise me!! If that happened, like Spank, I would become a man...

Val said...

@Spank-you're killing me!
@Brenda Jean-"I would just live in my own little Denial World where he was still straight." Me too!
I have wondered before, only because you never see many pics of him with a girl/woman. But I think he has stated that there are few people worth his time to hang out with. So are girls not worth his time?

Anonymous said...

There's no way. Gay men use "product" and actually wash their hair.

Unknown said...

@ everyone You guys are hilarious! VanetaRogers, you make an excellent point!

Happy Valentine's Day! May your men sparkle for you today!

imbeingheldhostage said...

ok, was here earlier but was so disturbed by the topic of Edward being gay I had to leave.
There's just some things that should never be messed with. The formula for Reeses cups, imovie (apple should've left it like it was, thankyouverymuch), my nikon-- but THIS borders on near blasphemy. Edward Cullen is NOT gay. Little Ashes is a perfect title for this movie since I honestly believe my retinas will burn if I have to watch Rob in an underwater love scene with a guy.

Yeah, guess I'm still upset... I'll go away and re-read New Moon or something.

Anonymous said...

Oh, I would still love him just as much - no question. Although, my dreams would be quite a bit different from then on...

Nicholas said...

Nobody who talks to me the way he does (in my dreams at night) could possibly be gay. Shame on you!

Shannon said...

"Figures"

That would be my first thought...

Anonymous said...

Dali was no Edward. I saw a Salvador Dali exhibit in London a few years ago, which was very disturbing, the guy had some serious problems; he was talented but very disturbed! I am very worried about Rob and this movie.